i hate myself so much whenever i disappoint him. i really like him so so much. i'm so scared he's gonna leave me. he's mad at me rn. why do i keep fucking things up?? why? why can't i shut up and just take it? why do i have to complain. from now on i won't complain to him ever again. i'll be the best girl i can be for him even if it means stripping away any respect i have for myself. god please let everything be ok. i can't be alone again.